That doesn’t mean that I’m not getting tired of eating alone. I’m a damn fine dinner companion. Breakfast and lunch, too, while we’re at it.
I’m pretty clear about who I am and what I have to bring to the relationship table. If they don’t want to get into the relation-ship with me and row in the same direction, great! I’m looking for someone who will get into the ship with me and work together at getting somewhere together.
That makes me think of the expression, “that ship has sailed”. Going, going, gone…
I’ve worked hard at being happy and satisfied with who I am. And I am. I genuinely like me. I’ve kept a low profile but I know that I’m wanting another special relationship because I’m at my best when I’m in a relationship. I miss that.
Love is not unbridled passion and grandiose gestures; that’s lust. Lust is intoxicating at first, but it will spin me around until I end up on the floor, completely disoriented and unable to function.
Just as fear is mistaken for love, so is lust. Lust distracts me from life. Love encourages me to live.
Love is like the oak tree that’s been there for hundreds of years. I know it will always be there, even if the tree is chopped down; the roots will remain.
Love is the morning hug and kiss at home that I still feel standing in the produce aisle of the grocery store that night.
Love is love when there is no question of its existence and its loyalty. It was there, it is there, it will always be there. Just like the tree, it stands right where it is.
Love is not love if it is in constant movement; yes it can grow, blossom and sway, but it doesn’t stray.
The elation, the sweep off my feet feeling, that’s just temporary, like a gust of wind. Yet I chase it, I try to catch it and make it stay. It never will and I will end up on my knees gasping for breath because lust is elusive, it is and will remain, a mystery.
Love is stationary. Love is the look across the table when I tell a story about my day that is less than exciting and the eyes staring back are intent, listening to every word, captivated by my life, every piece of it and celebrates the details.
Love is the embrace of details, because every one of my thoughts, feelings and dreams, matter.
Love is not bloated with pedestals and infatuated with idealism. This will only last as long as I do, standing on one leg or a broken pillar. I will fall in the end and it will hurt, terribly.
Love is the acceptance of each person as they are. Whole separately and whole together.
Love does not utter the words, “You are too this or that.”
Love doesn’t struggle, it doesn’t know how to, but fear does. Fear loves to misunderstand, misinterpret and fight for what it believes to be right. But love? Love doesn’t need to be right, instead it listens until it understands.
I mistake fear for love because I’ve gone numb.
November 23, 2015
You know, you don’t have to eat alone. Right now, you are actively choosing that. I’m going to be blunt, but you’re wasting away your life. I love you and want to see you happy. I know for a fact that there are dozens of kind, smart, and most importantly, available men who would love to spend time with you. Just give them the chance, please. A woman such as yourself should not be alone unless she wants to be.
November 24, 2015
I think you need to get out of town for a while, break patterns and habits. Most of all, come see ME!!!! 🙂
November 25, 2015
This is the time that you have faith, beautiful. I think you’re on the right track. Believe!